immortalising a giRaffe...

In a different aeon of time and space, publishing an autobiography was the privilege only of the high and mighty.

Now however, with all sorts of places around the cyberspace floating around, free, our fleeting existence in this time and space holds the potential to be immortalised, all so easily.

And hence as a giRaffe realises it is writing its own immortality into cyberspace, giRaffe promises to ensure that it will try to be entertaining. Not that it can succeed all the time, since a giRaffe has never ever succeeded in anything in its life yet, but at least it can promise to try.

Be warned though, giRaffe may be telling a whole pack of lies. But the purpose of these lies are to ensure continued entertainment. Anyway, the telling of one's story can never be completely free from lies unless one wishes to bore one's readers to death.

"I woke up. I went to the toilet to wash myself up and as I took my toothbrush to brush my teeth, I knocked on the soap in the soap box and spilled the whole thing. I picked up the soap, put it back into the soapbox, and continued brushing my teeth."

"'You have access to the greatest source of knowledge and power in the universe.' 'Well, I do talk to myself sometimes, yes.' I jumped up to Tom Baker's booming voice, having forgotten that I had changed my alarm tone into one of my favourite Doctor Who quotes the night before. Ouch! I gasped as I chipped a nail trying to turn off the booming voice before it manages to wake up the entire neighbourhood.

Staggering into the bathroom, for I was never good with mornings, I hit the soapbox as I was trying to take my toothbrush. With a crash, the soapbox fell onto the floor of the bathroom and as I was trying to find out where it had landed in the darkness since I've yet to replace the burnt out light bulb in my bathroom, I stepped onto the huge piece of beautifully slippery soap. WHAM! Lying supine on the cool floor of my dark bathroom, a thought came to me that, it was quite a nice position to be pondering the existence of the universe. My mind had just floated to the first few seconds after the big bang when my cat decided to jump onto my tummy, and proceeded to wash his face with all calm and poise. On my tummy."

See my point? giRaffe's bathroom is not large enough for it to lie supine and ponder the existence of the universe comfortably. Nor is its light bulb burnt out, though sometimes in the mornings, giRaffe does use the toilet in darkness since it does not like to be rudely awakened early in the morning by harsh lights. But these lies do make everything infinitely more entertaining.

And since giRaffe is not any high and mighty being whose every single action will be studied with seriousness and care, no one would want to read about a giRaffe who wasn't entertaining, would they?

So take everything you read here with a pinch of salt, hey, actually, take everything you read with a pinch of salt for that matter! Don't take a giRaffe too seriously, have some fun and a glass of wine.


*In case you are wondering, giRaffe has decided to embrace the pronoun "it" instead of "he" or "she". giRaffe has never been comfortable with gender stereotypes and besides the fact that one is born physically either male or female, giRaffe finds having the consideration of gender in one's daily life a huge hindrance. Unless one is talking about mating, giRaffe does not think being male or female makes a difference. What makes more of a difference is everything else about that individual. The person's characteristics, history, believes, and so on. And so, to take the gender consideration out when you read about a giRaffe, giRaffe has decided to embrace the pronoun of "it".*

No comments: